Liathach - by Gavin Ferguson
Liathach
What did my friends do, and what did I do instead?
When I was 18, all of my friends decided to go on a big group holiday to a music festival in Spain. This plan was a bit too mainstream for me, so instead of joining my friends, I decided to do a quirky solo cycling and mountain climbing holiday in the Scottish highlands.
Cycling from hostel to hostel in the highlands can be arduous. Going up a hill is bad, but it’s not the end of the world because you can relax as you go down the hill after having reached the top. It was the wind that was the real soul destroyer. When I rode north, the wind blew south, when I rode South, the wind blew north.
What is ‘Munro-bagging’?
In Scotland, any mountain above 3000ft is called a ‘Munro’. There are 282 Munros and people try to climb them in an activity called ‘Munro bagging’. One of my goals for the trip was to bag as many Munros as possible.
When I arrived in the town of Torridon, I discovered that you could bag 2 Munros in one day if you climbed up a big mountain ridge called Liathach, which has a Munro at either end. I made a plan to climb up the first Munro, walk along the ridge, bag the second Munro and then slowly descend down the side of the mountain. I had almost no mountaineering experience and a staggeringly bad sense of direction – what could possibly go wrong?
What went wrong on Liathach?
Shortly after I had bagged the first Munro, a massive cloud came down and engulfed the entire mountain. I walked a considerable way along the ridge before deciding it was time to make my descent. The problem was that there were only certain parts of the mountain where it was safe to descend from, and I had absolutely no idea where I was.
I started going down the side of the mountain. The further down I went, the steeper it got, until it just became a sheer drop and then I had to climb all the way back to the ridge again and try to descend from a different point. I repeated this process about 5 times, each more demoralising and exhausting that the last.
What happened with the deer?
On one of these failed descents, I reached a sheer drop and decided I would have to go back up again. Just before I beginning my journey back up, I saw a deer standing about 15 metres away from me. We locked eyes. Back at sea level, if I made eye contact with a deer I would look down on it. I would chuckle at the vacant look in its eye and the emptiness of its thoughts. But standing on this mossy cliff edge, the shoe was firmly on the other foot. Up in Liathach, it was the deer who reigned intellectually supreme.
While my friends were staring into the eyes of girls in bikinis by the side of the pool in Spain, I was staring into the eyes of a smug-looking deer by the side of a cliff. My stomach felt heavy with depression and fear.
How did I get rescued?
As dusk set in at around 8pm, I didn’t know what to do so I called the police on my Nokia 32-10. They put me through to the local mountain rescue team. After I explained my situation to the group leader, he asked me if I would like to be rescued now or I could hang tight until the morning. Before he had reached the end of the word ‘or’, I had told him I wanted to be rescued now.
They told me to wait at the top of the ridge for their arrival. It was extremely windy at the top of the mountain, so I built a little horseshoe-shaped shelter from stones in order to break the wind. I got into my shelter and lay in the foetal position until the rescue team arrived. At half past midnight, 4 men arrived with a dog to rescue me. I don’t remember much of our interaction other than that I felt like a pathetic twat. We got back off the mountain at 4am and I went to bed in my hostel.
Who is Jim?
The next morning I was awoken by my ‘uncle’ Jim. He was on holiday in the area and after he heard about my ordeal, he decided to come and pay me a visit. Jim is exactly the kind of cheerful guy you would want to see after such an experience. He made me a hearty fry-up and lifted my spirits. Earlier this year, Jim sadly passed away, but this is a memory of him that I will cherish forever.
This is a list of key vocabulary and expressions from the article in order of how useful they are. The student must choose 6 items from the list to study in the lesson.
To stare (at someone/ something)
Definition: To look at someone or something for a long time, often without looking away.
Example: It’s rude to stare at people on the train.Cheerful
Definition: Happy, positive, and in a good mood.
Example: She’s always cheerful, even when she has had a difficult day.Not the end of the world
Definition: Used to say that a problem or disappointment is not as serious as it may seem.
Example: We missed the bus, but it’s not the end of the world.A twat - (very rude word, not to be used in front of children)
Definition: A very offensive informal word for a stupid, unpleasant, or annoying person.
Example: He was being a complete twat, so I decided to leave.Steep
Definition: Having a sharp slope; going up or down at a large angle.
Example: The path up the mountain was incredibly steep.If I made eye contact with a deer, I would look down on it.
Definition: This is an example of the second conditional, which is used to talk about an unreal, unlikely, or hypothetical situation in the present or future. The structure is: if + past simple, would + base verb. In this sentence, “If I made eye contact with a deer” describes the hypothetical situation, and “I would look down on it” describes the imagined result.
Example: If I saw a bear in the forest, I would slowly walk away.Mainstream
Definition: The ideas, opinions, entertainment, or culture that are considered normal or popular among most people.
Example: Her music is quite different from mainstream pop.Dusk
Definition: The time of day when the sun has just gone down and it is becoming dark.
Example: We arrived at the campsite just before dusk.To look down on someone
Definition: To think that you are better, more important, or more intelligent than someone else.
Example: He tends to look down on people who don’t have university degrees.A cliff
Definition: A high, steep area of rock or land, usually with a very steep side.
Example: They stood at the edge of the cliff and looked out over the sea.To cherish (something/ someone)
Definition: To love, value, and care deeply about someone or something.
Example: She cherishes the memories of her childhood.Staggering
Definition: Extremely surprising, shocking, or impressive because something is much greater than expected.
Example: The company made a staggering amount of money last year.To chuckle
Definition: To laugh quietly, especially because you find something amusing.
Example: He chuckled when he remembered what had happened.Quirky
Definition: Unusual or slightly strange in an interesting, amusing, or attractive way.
Example: She has a quirky sense of humour.An ordeal
Definition: A very difficult, unpleasant, or painful experience.
Example: The long journey home was an absolute ordeal.Hearty
Definition: Large, satisfying, and filling, especially when describing food; it can also mean warm, enthusiastic, or energetic.
Example: We had a hearty meal of soup, bread, and roast vegetables.To put (someone) through (to someone)
Definition: To connect someone on the telephone to another person.
Example: Could you put me through to the manager, please?Demoralising
Definition: Making someone lose confidence, enthusiasm, or hope.
Example: Losing five matches in a row was very demoralising for the team.The shoe is on the other foot
Definition: Used when a situation has been reversed and someone is now experiencing what another person experienced before.
Example: He used to criticise me for being late, but now the shoe is on the other foot because he’s always late.Smug
Definition: Too pleased with yourself or your achievements, in a way that is annoying to other people.
Example: He looked very smug after winning the argument.To hang tight
Definition: To wait patiently and stay where you are until something happens or someone arrives.
Example: Hang tight for a few minutes while I finish this call.To engulf (something/ someone)
Definition: To completely surround or cover something or someone, often in a way that is powerful or overwhelming.
Example: The flames quickly engulfed the building.Sheer
Definition: Used to emphasise the size, amount, force, or extent of something, often meaning complete or absolute.
Example: The sheer size of the crowd was incredible.Arduous
Definition: Very difficult and requiring a lot of effort, energy, or time.
Example: Climbing the mountain was an arduous task.To reign supreme
Definition: To be the most successful, powerful, or dominant person or thing in a particular area.
Example: For many years, the company reigned supreme in the smartphone market.
15 conversation-provoking questions related to the article.
1. What did my friends do, and what did I do instead?
2. What is ‘Munro-bagging’?
3. What went wrong on Liathach?
4. What happened with the deer?
5. How did I get rescued?
6. Who is Jim?
7. What is a typical holiday for teenagers to do in your native country?
8. Did you have any friends’ holiday when you were a teenager?
9. Do you remember your first mobile phone?
10. Could you enjoy travelling alone?
11. If you had been in my situation, how would you have behaved?
12. What should I have done differently?
13. Do you prefer niche holidays to mainstream ones?
14. Did you do anything stupid when you were younger?
15. Should parents try to stop their 18 year-old kids from doing stupid things?